Oh Thursday, being wasted is so "Friday" of you.

This just in my head: Maybe a guy binge drinking on a Thursday isn't so much "sad" as he is "innovative".

THE WEEKEND ISN'T EVEN HERE YET! A trend setter, the next day- EVERYONE is doing it (even pregnant people). Clearly this guy is someone to be looked up to, just ask my ex-boyfriend (also ask him if he got tested, so I don't have to).

A widely held belief is that a disease drives people to drink... or me (Hi Mom).

GET READY FOR "THIS IS LIKE THAT":

A Wednesday drunk is the Mark Zuckerberg of liver failure! He get's up, goes to work (unless he's committed), maybe he throws one down before brushing his teeth- maybe he doesn't brush his teeth. This guy doesn't smoke, but takes "smoke breaks" plugging away at his passion. He knows that sometimes you have to juggle your daily obligations with your personal ambitions and it's not really "stealing company time" if you're all balanced and shit. Tuesday drunk, well that's next level shit... over my head, so I wont presume to lend voice to it.

There is another side to this trend: the Sunday/ Monday drinkers... The weekend is really over, but they can't let go. S&M drinkers are Bruce Willis to the early 2000's. They've been riding The Fifth Element well into a regular spot on Friends, but they also know that Live Free Or Die Hard is a fun movie, making failed relationships and a disappointing existence worth the Whole Nine Yards.

It's Thursday and I ate a pint of ice cream... I like to think I am working on being a supportive wife to an important man, having "pregnancy cravings". Manifest Destiny over here!
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Sans Continuity

You might be asking yourself... what happened to your last post? The one where you're having so much fun at the expense of others? Well, I deleted it. There are limits and lines you shouldn't cross, people and if people keep crossing them, well then a wall goes up. I am living in a self-imposed cell block and I don't want any company... sad? sure. I have been forever, but I will try to have some fun with it now.

I was on the bus, lonely and cold... the bus got crowded and a large woman sat next to me. I was irritated for two blocks because I like my space, but after a little while I warmed up against her protesting skin, stretched beyond reason to house the extra helpings of love she didn't receive as a child. I began to care for this woman, where she came from, what happened to her... then she left, just like everyone else in my life and there I was, colder than before. Her seat was filled by some other poor person and I just couldn't bring myself to love again... not so soon.

There is a 400 lb man-boy assuming I will bed him if he keeps flashing me his machismo. So, that's flattering. Say, do you know where my healthy body can get stuffed with chubby cock? What's that? Your dick has love-handles? I didn't know penises got saddle bags- I'm so intrigued- show me!

I'm super attractive, smart, employed, funny and together... where can a girl like me find a broke, swaggering, fat, cigarette-smoking greyhound bus to plow into my perfectly maintained vagina?! No, I'm not mad- I'm a woman, so I am just like this roller coaster of absurdity. I understand some women treat their vagina like they got it at an Enterprise and can just turn it in for another vagina once they run this one into a tree, but I take care of myself. I value my body and I resent so greatly when a man thinks that I should be responsive to his suggestions of us hooking up. You add 220 lbs to the mix and I get pregnant. Get me filled with obese fetus PRONTO! I can't wait... what does a fat man's dick look like? I'm dying [inside] to know!

Right now, I kinda feel like a man... like a happily married man who has an affair... How he has a loving wife and family, but wants to wet his dick on some fresh putang... because I took a shower earlier, but I might take a bath in a few... maybe I'll get my hair wet, but I shouldn't... people will know.

I have been sad about a boy. I have been so sad because he's like a little retard and I hate him, but I don't because I loved him so much once, but now I'm just going to not like him anymore because, he was terrible. He is also a retard and I don't like those people... taking all our jobs. I can say "retard" without being offensive because my brother is an alcoholic.

I told myself I wouldn't be happy about tonight if I didn't write... we'll see if this works.